i fly COACH
i have been traveling a lot lately. and while i generally like to travel, these recent trips (really, the time spent en route) for work have been wholly unrewarding. on my most recent trip to tallahassee fl, i came to the conclusion that i find airports to be the most loathesome environments. take my adventure from charlottesville to charlotte, for instance. i wrote an account of it while sitting in charlotte, waiting for a very late connector to tallahassee. i was forced to wait for a very late flight because i missed the earlier flight that i was scheduled to take. this was due to my flight from charlottesville to charlotte (which originated in charlotte) being delayed for two hours. mind you, it was delayed two hours, but only in 20 min intervals, so it wasn't like i could go home and wait for it.while i waited in the charlottesville airport for my never-arriving flight to charlotte, i was surrounded by numerous giants of the basketball-playing type. they were high school students and one or two excessively boisterous chaperones who were also waiting on the flight to charlotte. with the stench of cologne, the incessant bouncing of basketballs, the a capella, off-key singing, and the out-right demands of special attention, they were the most obnoxious airport ignorati. this was just the beginning of my bad travel kharma.
so i finally made it to charlotte and was looking forward to sitting somewhere and catch up on some blog reading. with a gradiose name like charlotte douglas international airport you'd expect luxury and convenience. no chance! i trekked up and down that very spread-out and poorly-organized airport to find a damn wi-fi connection. the only wi-fi connection is in the middle of the f-ing central terminal (i landed in one of the most remote terminals) in a tiny room full of business men. you can not connect to wireless anywhere else in the terminal (umm, WTF?). so, nestled in that little cocoon of wi-fi comfort, i was about as far away from my gate as i could possibly be, with no idea whether my plane was on time, not coming, nor if it even exists. what's worse was that on my many strolls through terminals A, B, C, D, and E, i could find no mention of my flight on the “tv screens,” as the monitors displaying flight info are called by the announcers who implore you to check them for your flight info. seriously people, are we so ignorant as to not know that a monitor showing flight information is just that, a monitor, not a “tv screen”? and, btw - why did you never post the status of my flight? good thing i had the sense to get to my gate a bit early and ask!
but maybe the majority of travelers are that ignorant – i certainly came to that conclusion after even the shortest jaunt through charlotte douglas. i was appalled at the outfits people travel in. what are they thinking? wedges and miniskirts; velour sweatpants, athletic socks and flip-flops; hoochie hot pants and high heels!
now don’t misunderstand, i'm all for traveling in style. i do not advocate for schlubbing around in lounge wear when traveling. however, there is an aspect of travel fashion that demands common sense. when you are hustling through the terminal along with hundreds of others, do you really need to show the world how incapable you are of walking in wedges, or how much of your fat ass is spilling out of your mini skirt, or, god forbid, both!
speaking of ignorance and outlandish fashion sense: the young woman, clad head-to-toe in COACH labels (from sweater to shoes to shopping bag - sort of ironic when you're (i assume)traveling first class), in the queue with me at the starbucks (nope, no wi fi there!) heard me order a tall double latte. she turned to me and asked “what is a tall double latte”? i just about choked. could she be serious? did she just fall of the back of the most remote convent/boarding school pick-up truck? just happen to wander into the starbucks because it looked appealing? i mean, i make no assertions that a starbucks latte actually resembles a real-live, delicious espresso beverage, however i thought the abundance that is starbucks had fully educated the public (every public) of the myriad of espresso and milk combinations. anyway i was visibly flummoxed by her question, and she, sensing my hesitation, worked it out for sherself in her fashion-adled pea brain. is it a latte with two shots, she asked. i could barely muster a yes and a head nod.
i am sure there was much more shock and awe while i was in charlotte, but it has now been supplanted by the lovely time i spent in tallhassee. i stayed in a downtown bed and breakfast called the inn at park avenue with an amazingly lovely hostess and enjoyed wine on the screened porch in a glorious southern afternoon thunderstorm. my time spent in tallahassee more than made up for my misadventures in getting there.
posted by bls @ 9:28 AM
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